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I am a happily married swinger in suburban Minneapolis. My husband and I have been married for 20+ years and exploring various aspects of consensual non-monogamy since the beginning. Sabrina Swings is the place where I share our experiences. The blog is part true erotic swinging stories, but mostly philosophical discussions of some of the lifestyle's most common questions. How do I get into swinging? How do I talk my spouse into swinging? How do I know if I should swing? Do swingers get jealous? How often do swingers have sex? Where can I find a swinging playmate? Hope you enjoy!

The Danger of the Build-Up

 Posted by on 10 August 2010
Aug 102010
 

So a week ago on Sunday, I posted a booty-call looking for some fun with a new guy. As is usually the case with booty calls, it seemed to take forever to get a response. I did eventually get a response from a single guy whose profile sounded great and whose pics seemed perfectly normal enough. Since it was later in the evening, and my husband works early, the single guy and I made plans to hook up on Thursday night instead. My husband and I agreed to drive out to his place on Thursday night for a potential hook-up depending on how things went.

The single guy and I spent the rest of the week flirting via text message and getting ourselves all worked up for Thursday night. He seemed like he was going to be great. He was attentive and flirtatious via text. He asked me what kind of wine I might like and said he would make sure to have whatever I wanted. During the early part of the week, I was really looking forward to meeting him and was excited about the prospect of finding a new regular “boyfriend”. My husband was concerned that the guy was getting “expectations.” I thought he might be too, but I knew that I could decide to leave at any time.

Thursday night finally arrived, and although I had to work later than expected, we arrived at his place around 9pm. Unfortunately, the minute he opened the door, I realized that I wasn’t really attracted to him. Damn! This isn’t the first time that I’ve built up a sexual connection with a guy via texting, only to have the connection fall flat once we actually met in person. Despite my initial desire to immediately turn around and go back home, my husband and I entered the apartment. I gave our new friend a quick embrace, and I have to admit that he did smell nice. Just as he promised, he had chocolate and a bottle of Riesling. He poured me a glass and also offered my husband something to drink. (He chose water.)

I walked into his livingroom and took a set on one end of the couch. My husband took a seat on a nearby chair, leaving the spot next to me on the couch for the potential “victim.” (Seems like this is the standard seating arrangement for when we are meeting a guy for 3somes.) The single guy followed us in from the kitchen and, very respectfully, asked if he could take the spot next to me on the couch. I started spouting off about work and how it had been a long, stressful day for me. Basically trying to do whatever I could to keep the conversation OFF anything sexy.

The single guy then made a move that exponentially increased his chances of getting his dick inside me: He offered to rub my feet. I absolutely love having my feet rubbed and would love to find a guy who really, really wants to caress, kiss, and pamper my feet. I believe I could probably orgasm just from a good foot rub alone, but I have never had someone willing to provide that level of attention. I adjusted my position and brought my feet up to his lap. He started slow, and his hands were a bit clammy. I tried to relax and find out just exactly what kind of tricks this man might have up his sleeve. Sure, I wasn’t immediately attracted to him, but perhaps with the right attention paid to my feet, my pussy could be persuaded. He took one of my feet in his hands and began his “massage.” I tried to enjoy. I tried to be patient, waiting for him to adjust the pressure and style to my liking. Waited. Wished. Hoped. Finally, I realized that his foot rubbing skills weren’t up to par. This wasn’t going anywhere. Quite spontaneously, I simply said something like, “Well, I can tell this isn’t going to happen tonight for me.” I thanked him for his time and for waiting for us (even though we were an hour late). I even gave him a kiss good night and complimented him on his sexy smell. He did deliver as promised on the cologne, the wine, and the chocolate. Perhaps I didn’t give him an opportunity to deliver on the rest, but if the chemistry isn’t there, it’s just not there. It’s just unfortunate that I let it build up for nearly a week via texting. This happened one other time where the texting was hot and fun and the pictures seemed nice enough, but in person there was just no chemistry. I think it would be smartest for me to postpone the text flirtation until AFTER I’ve met someone and determined that there is some chemistry.

Not a bad way to spend 30 minutes of an evening. (Not including the 30 minute drive each way, of course.) I really wanted to spend time with my husband anyway.

  2 Responses to “The Danger of the Build-Up”

Comments (2)
  1.  

    I love your description of the foot rub. I’m like you and love to have my feet rubbed and if a new man offers to rub my feet when we first meet, more and likely he will be inside of me in a short while.

    I find that wearing fancy flip flop type sandals really turn the men on also.

  2.  

    I’d love to find a guy who had a full-on foot fetish and wanted to give me pedicures including full massages and painting my toenails.

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