Welcome to SabrinaSwings!

I am a happily married swinger in suburban Minneapolis. My husband and I have been married for 20+ years and exploring various aspects of consensual non-monogamy since the beginning. Sabrina Swings is the place where I share our experiences. The blog is part true erotic swinging stories, but mostly philosophical discussions of some of the lifestyle's most common questions. How do I get into swinging? How do I talk my spouse into swinging? How do I know if I should swing? Do swingers get jealous? How often do swingers have sex? Where can I find a swinging playmate? Hope you enjoy!

Jan 092015

It’s so easy to sometimes get off track when attempting to embrace our sexuality. What starts out as a desire to express ourselves with confident sexuality becomes an exercise in trying to attain some arbitrary ideal. Our insecurities start revealing themselves with questions like: Am I showing enough cleavage? Am I too fat? Does my skin have any imperfections? Is my pubic hair appropriately trimmed? Will “he” or “she” think I am sexy?

These questions start to make us doubt our own worth as sexual beings. This self-doubt is the cause of so many unsatisfying sexual encounters. In a desperate attempt to assure ourselves that we are worthy, attractive, and desirable, we engage in experiences that do not connect to our sense of self. If instead we can be brave enough to claim our own definition of sexy, we can trust that the universe will bring us the right connections for love, lust, and leisure.

I am inspired by the idea of creating something meaningful for people as they explore their sexual/sensual psyche.  I have always been intrigued by sexuality in its many forms. My personal experience includes what I consider a healthy expression of open sexuality that often includes having more than one lover at a time. It’s been difficult to figure out how to truly embrace this aspect of my personality. As a result, most people in my real life know just a tiny bit about my philosophy around sex and relationships.  From all outside appearances, my husband and I have a typical long-term monogamous marriage. Our marriage is typical in many ways, but we have this secret. We have included elements of exploratory non-monogamy for nearly our entire marriage.

Someday I would love to experience the freedom of being completely open and honest with the world regarding my personal sexuality and our marriage.  When we, as human beings, can find a way to love, care, and fully accept ourselves inside and out. Our sexuality can be awakened as a creative, sensual, intellectual outlet for personal expression on our own terms.


I would love to hear from you. How do you embrace your own personal expression of sensuality and sexuality. Do you feel free to be open and honest about your sexual relationship philosophies? Leave a comment or email me at sabrinaswings-AT-gmail.com

Please visit these links for similar thoughts:

Open Sexuality and Human Experience

Weight and Body Image in Swinging – Sexuality and Libido


  4 Responses to “Embracing (and Expressing) Your Inner Sexuality”

Comments (4)

    Confidence is such a huge stumbling block for me in this Lifestyle. It prevents me from being as adventurous as I (and the hubs) would really like to be. Also, living in a small town with no larger towns nearby makes it difficult to ever be “open” about our choices. Lately
    I have been really wishing for another like-minded swinging wife to talk to. Sigh.



      Thank you for your comment. Confidence takes practice and it sometimes helps me to remember that others are also dealing with their own feelings of insecurity. When I turn my motivations to helping others feel confident and sexy, it helps me feel less self conscious.

      Consider me your like-minded swinging wife. 🙂 That’s part of the reason I’ve started this blog. Are you and your husband on any lifestyle social networks? I suggest Lifestyle Lounge and Kasidie. Both are great. Which one works best for you will depend on which is most popular in your area.

      Have a great day and thank you again for your comment.

      (The links in this comment are referral links. You will receive a complimentary trial membership. If you decide to join with a paid membership, I will receive a referral credit which helps support this site.)


    Hi stumbled across your blog. Literally!
    I’m a recently seperated woman in my 40’s who has been on a sexual quest for the last 3 years now. I have never felt more sexually free as I do now.
    I recently attended by first swingers event and boy what an eye opener that was!!
    I went with a guy who has years of swinging experience so my initiation was gentle. We met a lovely couple and chatted and then it was suggested we find a room and ‘play’.
    I thought I’d be nervous but I wasn’t. It was liberating the whole experience. I’ve been back since and am going again this weekend.
    I had been looking online blogs and here I am. My life has changed so much in that last 6 months and it excites me.
    It’s good to read other people’s experiences
    Thanks again


      Welcome!! I’m so glad your first experience was a good one. Let me know if there are any topics you’d like to see me bring up on the blog.

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